India has had a strong culture of arranged marriages since ancient times, however, in this era of globalization every culture in the world is evolving and with it so is the Indian Culture. Nowadays, people are leaning towards the concept of love marriage, which has begun quite a controversial debate as Love marriage vs. arranged marriage.
Marriage is a bond of a lifetime which can only be preserved through understanding and commitment. For a successful, these two things are essential, however, as simple as it seems, in both loves and arranged marriage these two things take different turns.
Let us understand the course of these two kinds of marriages and how it changes throughout the years. In love marriage, we fall in love with the person that we choose. When one is in love, passion for one another is at its peak which oftentimes drives the relationship we have. Then in the midst of the passion we commit to each other oftentimes without taking into account factors such as compatibility, plans, family’s opinions.
In Indian culture, family plays a big role in one’s life so it is significant to take into account what our family thinks about the partner we choose. Marrying the love of your life is like living the dream, however, in the long run of the marriage, the passion starts to decay after some time, which was the whole and soul of the start of the relationship.
While in an arranged marriage, parents or elderly in the house choose a partner for us with whom we can see if one is compatible, what each other’s goals are. Arranged marriage has the advantage of things such as understanding between families. Arranged marriages can be seen as an absurd concept by some people, however, it has been in India since its origin and India has one of the lowest divorce rates in the world. Statistics always seem to have backed the concept of arranged marriages.
Both Love and arranged marriages have their own sets of advantages and disadvantages. Like, the passion starts to grow after marriage in the case of arranged marriage however, it starts to decay after marriage in the case of love marriage. There is immense excitement in an arranged marriage as everything is new and both are exploring life with each other to see how they can make it work.
However, these stages are long passed in love marriage with a relationship before marriage which seems to lower the excitement. While in love marriage, one has the advantage of knowing each other beforehand which allows one to accept each other’s flaws, however, it becomes difficult in an arranged marriage as it is after all arranged. In India these both concepts come with further different sets of challenges and perks.
In an arranged marriage, when unfortunately marriage does not work, parents are as much as to blame as you did not choose the partner yourself. However, if love marriage fails, then the whole blame lies on your head increasing societal pressure. In a time of crisis, both families come to help the couple in an arranged marriage, however in love marriage, marrying against parent’s will drift the family apart.
All these factors show different advantages and disadvantages in both cases, so the question remains that “which is a better option?”. Marriage is a structure built upon the foundation of mutual understanding, respect, trust, loyalty, commitment. In India, one more factor is added as both families also get united in the form of marriage.
So, be it love or arranged marriage, the family does play a big part in it. So, it seems to have a solution as arranged love or proper love which is accepted by both the families. Falling in love with someone your parents choose or make your parents fall in love with the person you choose, both can be part of the solution to this debate. At the end of the day, be it arranged or love, marriage is going to be successful only when its foundation is strong.